I am listening to the podcast 372 Pages We’ll Never Get Back. In episode 9-16 they discuss Armada.
372 Pages We’ll Never Get Back 
Real or fanfic
The spreadsheet !
Summary of important advice
Consistency, continuity.
- Yawnsville the young man said.
- There’s an important difference between young Clark Kent and young Luke Skywalker?
- Claiming a group of real people made a game, when they don’t have the skills.
- The reasonable people are also villains.
- Mom uses a lot more time than is possible.
- The keying of a car is (not) very visible.
- Feels Star Wars fandom is embarrasing, then immediately forgets it.
- Claiming Edge of Tomorrow and Avatar can be crossed in a meaningful way.
- Being surprised when the same thing happens again.
- Humans are just apes. Oh wait, we’re not.
- Going from being shallow to caring deeply about the planet.
- Being in a hurry, but waiting for the other guy to turn around a corner.
- Anachronisms.
- Weak jokes, big laughs.
- People have learned something earth shattering, and they behave normally.
- Zack thinks some sf movies are bad?
- To my surprise I did something, I’ve done many times before.
- Is it power leap or power jump?
- Rocky Balboa does not sound like a person from Philadelphia.
- He detects irony, but it’s also lost on him.
- Dad had psychological issues, but wasn’t fired.
- Star Trek and Wars are important, but neither are really about aliens invading Earth.
- Admiral Akbar famously IDENTIFIES traps.
- Happily nodding while so many people just died.
- It makes no sense, I understand it perfectly.
- Society is mentioned, but it was actually 3 people.
- The swastika in the beginning was stupid, the aliens are smart.
Be exciting. Have stakes.
- A lot of pages, almost no plot.
- A list of years and events.
- Boring controllers.
- A fictitious ad.
- Someone playing a game.
- An unboxing.
- Battle cry: Let’s do diz.
- Show, don’t tell.
- But I’m agnostic! Simply don’t mention it.
- Lengthy recap of battle.
- Big news, father is alive, and it’s just said, dryly. Unforced error.
- Pregnant pause + stand for an awkward beat.
- Stereotypes.
- Repetition of phrases. Glance. Enormous x 2 in 1 sentence. Video.
- A list of snacks.
- All the letters from dad are included. No surprises.
- Description of battle, not engaging.
- Boring: navigating through menus.
- Repetition of words. Contorted (face). That playlist.
- Cliché ending.
Flow. Chekhov’s gun.
- Lex ex machina.
- Heavy or clumsy foreshadowing.
Originality.
- Flat out stealing Terminator.
- Stealing valor. Quotes by great people.
Realism. Being human.
- Eating 1 pop-tart?
- 18-years old and spitballs.
- Boy finds stack of video games, reads diary.
- Boy is satisfied with explanation for how dad died, but then turns 10.
- 10-years-olds have guilty pleasures?
- How many back to back to back viewings?
- The government controlled the ENTIRE video game industry?
- Dumb joke amused him EVERY TIME.
- Children like being bored by adults.
- My mom is insanely hot.
- My mother would protect me with heavy weaponry.
- Close to graduating high school, but has no plans.
- Just teenagers in general.
- Defending against aliens isn’t a team sport?
- The aliens move in very predictable 4/4 rhythms.
- Out of body. I heard myself gasp.
- That Hollywood plan was bad.
- High school seniors know they have father figures?
- Zack’s eating meatloaf, mom tries to slow him down every few minutes.
- A very long line in a conspiratorial voice.
- The voices of Sagan and James Earl Jones are wonderful/evil.
- Everything is either memorized or almost forgotten.
- Synchronized screaming.
- There’s a standard Nintendo controller?
- “Boom!” the 18-year-old said.
- Emotions bouncing around.
- Zack destroys a valuable ship, and the admiral is playfully sarcastic.
- Oh, and your father is a crybaby, said the admiral.
- The attack is in 5 hours! Also, here’s a uniform.
- Token Asian.
- A talks, all the time B is chuckling.
- People taking forever to recognize known motion.
- Zack doesn’t recognize praying.
- Very disdainful towards religion.
- Debbie has no answer to an attack on her religion.
- He missed that he might die???
- Feeling like a list of things.
- Everybody’s afraid, but father is delighted.
- Suddenly we’re in a hurry.
- Isolated people doing fine and making jokes.
- Being very surprised that father and son look alike.
- Suddenly sounding like Wodehouse.
- Every second counts and there’s time to talk hobbies.
- Soldiers shouldn’t have time for hobbies.
- You got my reference. Goofy grin.
- Dad’s mood swings.
- Zack can interpret all expressions.
- The admiral is very informal.
- Zack can identify fine bone china.
- Zack knows his own little tics.
- Even the new guy has given up on an error he just heard for the first time.
- The 3 top guys think there might be a conspiracy?
- Why all the secrecy?
- It doesn’t make sense dad makes this joke. Everybody makes the same kinds of joke all the time. Everybody’s the same person.
- Keep the war on drugs going until this gamer weed is perfected.
- Everybody’s so horny.
- How did Lex get promoted that fast?
- Gallows humor isn’t a well known word?
- Not checking the gym for people before shooting the roof.
- Long fingers. (Zack’s mom.)
- “Is that a tricorder?” End scene. (Was that a joke?)
- Being impressed by HD. On a small screen.
- Screaming for a long time.
Variety.
- New book, exactly the same style.
- Spitballs in school, cliché.
- A lot of Star Wars references.
- 2 Star Wars references close together.
- Repetition, cyclopean.
- Everything is instant. Everything is a million. Everything is exactly like… Make it smaller.
Details: not too many, not too few.
- Making a subtle reference, then immediately saying more.
- Excalibur, too much.
- Nobody wondered whether you lived close to school.
- Nobody wondered about eyewitnesses.
- An avatar controlling a drone, hard to visualize.
- Explaining what a taunt is.
- Revealing an incident, that was easy to guess.
- Comparing a shape to Arecibo, not very well known.
- Bad physical descriptions. Hard to imagine.
- When did they see the shuttles? When they were there.
- Oh, it’s your first moon quake?
- Rushed chapters, abrupt ending.
- A lot happens in 1 sentence, could be a separate book.
- How rankings work.
- And that was all it took.
- Seconds later: Reports are coming in.
- In 1 sentence: Clean abundant energy. Cures for cancer.
POV. Tone.
- … as it came to be known. When is the narrator?
- The narrator doesn’t know what is going on.
- Calling something a fun fact, when it’s not fun. And during a serious section.
- Comparing a battle to Christmas lights, popcorn and beer cans. Not very battle-y.
Use words and phrases correctly.
- The distant horizon.
- Using the same unusual word in 2 consecutive sentences.
- How should sobrukai glaive be pronounced?
- Cold pop-tarts are raw?
- The retro outfit was retro from day 1?
- What’s a Garp phase?
- Wanderlust.
- An actor nails a role, that was original.
- We went to their moon AND we have the home team advantage.
- It looked exactly like (what it was).
- I had never been so glued to a screen.
- People of Europa = Europans, confusing.
- Calling something a power leap.
- WTF. I nodded in agreement.
- … power lines like Godzilla. Mangled sentence.
- Almost as if. Which I actually had. (It only feels like a simulation.)
- I wish we’d met a long time ago, said the teenager.
- … but … Not contradictory.
- Wrong name, book of revelations.
- Seeing 20/20 out of the corner of his eye.
- Radiant doesn’t mean that.
- How to write out the Close Encounters melody.
- Not just using the word “said”.
- Mom was FOND of pointing out his gaydar was broken, OFTEN.
- Consistently calling a ship shaped like a dodecahedron a dodecahedron. It had 3 names!
- Being reminded of something that is exactly the same.
- Blushing visibly.
- Gross:
- Sired.
- Woman described in a creepy way.
Ep. 9
Review or review, 9:20
- Mike guessing
- RP1 ❎ Armada ✔️ RP1 ✔️? Armada ✔️ RP1 ❎
Real or fanfic, 19:57
- Mike guessing
- Fanfic ❎ Fanfic ✔️
Mike wants to some day do an Ernest Hemingway contest, just for Cline.
Ep. 10, ch. 1-3
Don’t do this
- In general: the style is painfully similar to that of rp1.
- A lot of pages and almost no plot.
- Distant horizon. Unnecessary word.
- Using the same word in 2 consecutive sentences.
- Yawnsville. Are you Fonzie?
- The sobrukai glaive. Pronunciation? Jerry Lewis!
- Eating 1 pop-tart?
- Cold pop-tarts are raw?
- Making a subtle reference and then unsubtling it.
- The retro outfit was retro from day 1?
- Spitballs. Clichés. Sounds too young.
- Excalibur, too many details.
- Answering an unasked question. Distance between school and home.
- Saying there’s an important difference between a young Clark Kent and a young Luke Skywalker.
- What’s a Garp phase?
- Sired. Gross.
- Boy finds a stack of games and reads a diary instead.
- Boy thinks a few details of father’s death were enough, but then he turned 10.
- Literally a list of years and events. Boring. No comments.
- 10-year-olds have guilty pleasures?
- How many back to back viewings, doing nothing else?
- The government controlled the ENTIRE video game industry?
- Wanderlust?
- That the tie fighter is involved in the naming AND LOOK of the Thai restaurant? Absurd.
- Dumb joke amused him EVERY TIME.
- Children like being bored by adults?
- Play a game where an avatar controls a drone.
- Boring controllers. And an ad for a fictitious store. Someone playing a game. And then an unboxing.
- Claiming a game was made by real world people without the needed skills.
- Stealing too much: This is Terminator.
Running gags
- Hauling ass?
- Rush is back!
Oops.
- No, the episode isn’t 6 hours long.
Real or fanfic, 27:00
- Mike guessing
- Fanfic ✔️ Real ✔️
Ep. 11, ch. 4-7 (until phase 2)
Don’t do this
- My mother is insanely hot.
- My mother would protect me with heavy weaponry. Really?
- The reasonable people are depicted as villains. Like his grandmother who didn’t like, that his mother dated a loser.
- His mother works, goes out to dance and watches a lot of television. When?
- He’s close to finishing high school and have no plans?
- Self awareness without taking action. Being embarrassed by his Star Wars fandom, but then keeps talking about it lovingly.
- Assuming people don’t know what taunts are.
- Not accurately depicting teenagers now.
- An actor nails an original part.
- Defending against aliens isn’t a team sport?
- We went to their moon AND we have the home team advantage.
- Layers of simulation. Hard to picture.
- Detailed description of a video game session.
- Battle cry: let’s do diz.
- The aliens move in very predictable 4/4 rhythms.
- The keying of the car is very noticeable but also not.
- Revealing an incident, that was very easy to guess.
- There’s no doubt, but eyewitnesses are important.
- How do we cross Edge of Tomorrow and Avatar?
- I heard myself gasp.
- He’s surprised by the spaceships, again.
- The Hollywood plan was bad.
- High school seniors know they have father figures?
- His real name is… Yawn.
- It looked exactly like what it was.
Running gags
- A lot of back to back viewings.
- Insert hot before mom.
- Rigs.
- Observing oneself doing stuff.
- It seemed like an eternity. (But it wasn’t.)
Oops.
- “Where they live” only means something literally?
Real or fanfic, 37:22
- Mike guessing
- Hint: 1 is real
- Fanfic ✔️ Fanfic ❎ Fanfic ✔️ Real ❎
- Conor guessing
- Fanfic ✔️ Fanfic ✔️ Real ✔️ Fanfic ✔️
Ep. 12, ch. 8-11 (to 12)
Don’t do this
- Humans are just apes. Oh, wait, we’re not.
- Going from being shallow to caring deeply about the planet.
- Clichés.
- Zack’s eating meatloaf, mom tries to slow him down every few minutes.
- A very long line in a conspiratorial voice.
- Make sure references are crystal clear.
- A lot of Star Wars references.
- Being in a hurry, but waiting for the other guy to turn around a corner.
- Woman described in a creepy way.
- Anachronisms.
- Weak jokes, big laughs.
- People have learned something earth shattering, and they behave normally.
- Repetition, cyclopean.
- The voices of Sagan and James Earl Jones are wonderful/evil.
- Everything is either memorized or almost forgotten.
- Show, don’t tell.
- I had never been so glued to a screen.
- Zack thinks some sf movies are bad?
- People of Europa = Europans, confusing.
- Synchronized screaming.
- There’s a standard Nintendo controller?
- But I’m agnostic! Simply don’t mention it.
- Calling something a power leap.
- WTF. I nodded in agreement.
Running gags
- Pendergast.
- Not in control of ones own faculties.
- Hot mom.
- Clinean: What if I won’t do it? You’ll be drafted. I will? No.
- Rig in scrotum.
- A female of the species.
- Glaive.
- Like a… No, it IS a…
Real or fanfic, 28:27
- Conor guessing
- Fanfic. ✔️ Real. ❎ Fanfic. ✔️
- Mike guessing
- Fanfic. ✔️ Fanfic. ✔️ Fanfic. ❎ Real. ✔️
Spoken word performance about “apes”: Dance, Monkeys, Dance .
Ep. 13, ch. 12-15 (up to 16)
Don’t do this
- … as it came to be known. When is the narrator?
- The narrator doesn’t know what is going on.
- Calling something a fun fact, when it’s not fun. And during a serious section.
- To my surprise I did something, I’ve done many times before.
- “Boom!”
- Heavy or clumsy foreshadowing.
- Emotions bouncing around.
- 2 Star Wars references close together.
- Everything is instant. Everything is a million. Everything is exactly like… Make it smaller.
- … power lines like Godzilla. Mangled sentence.
- Is it power leap or power jump?
- Lengthy recap of battle.
- Was it my imagination? Hm.
- Keep on trucking. Anachronisms.
- Almost as if. Which I actually had. (It only feels like a simulation.)
- Zack destroys a valuable ship, and the admiral is playfully sarcastic.
- Big news, father is alive, and it’s just said, dryly. Unforced error.
- Oh, and your father is a crybaby.
- The attack is in 5 hours! Also, here’s a uniform.
- Thank Zod?
- I wish we’d met a long time ago, said the teenager.
- Token Asian.
- Pregnant pause + stand for an awkward beat.
- A talks, all the time B is chuckling.
- Stereotypes.
- … but … Not contradictory.
- Rocky Balboa does not sound like a person from Philadelphia.
- People taking forever to recognize known motion.
- Zack doesn’t recognize praying.
- Very disdainful towards religion.
- Debbie has no answer to an attack on her religion.
- Wrong name, book of revelations.
- He missed that he might die???
- Comparing a shape to Arecibo, not very well known.
- Seeing 20/20 out of the corner of his eye.
- He detects irony, but it’s also lost on him.
- Feeling like a list of things.
- Everybody’s afraid, but father is delighted.
- Sci fi theft!
- Suddenly we’re in a hurry.
- Radiant doesn’t mean that.
Running gags
- … as it came to be known.
- Pendergast.
- This is like (forgettable movie).
- Repeating information in back to back sentences.
- Pregnant pause. Cline, take it easy. Also, settle down.
- Seemed to.
- Glaive.
Oops.
- Just doesn’t like that a flier jinked.
Real or fanfic, 30:05
- Mike guessing.
- Fanfic ❎ Real ❎ Fanfic ✔️ Fanfic ✔️
March 28th is Guntober.
Snake ‘n Bacon.
Picture of Daedalus:
Ep. 14, ch. 16-18 (up to 19)
Don’t do this
- Isolated people doing fine and making jokes.
- Overexplaining references.
- Repetition of phrases. Glance. Enormous x 2 in 1 sentence. Video.
- Stereotypical Asian.
- Being very surprised that father and son look alike.
- Suddenly sounding like Wodehouse.
- Every second counts and there’s time to talk hobbies.
- Soldiers shouldn’t have time for hobbies.
- You got my reference. Goofy grin.
- Dad’s mood swings.
- Zack can interpret all expressions.
- A list of snacks.
- Bad physical descriptions. Hard to imagine.
- The admiral is very informal.
- Zack can identify fine bone china.
- When did they see the shuttles? When they were there.
- Zack knows his own little tics.
- Even the new guy has given up on an error he just heard for the first time.
- The 3 top guys think there might be a conspiracy?
- Why all the secrecy?
- All the letters from dad are included. No surprises.
- Dad had psychological issues, but wasn’t fired.
- Star Trek and Wars are important, but neither are really about aliens invading Earth.
- Admiral Akbar famously IDENTIFIES traps.
- How to write out the Close Encounters melody.
- 250 pages. Still no plot.
- It doesn’t make sense dad makes this joke. Everybody makes the same kinds of joke all the time. Everybody’s the same person.
- Stealing valor. Quotes by great people.
Running gags
- Hot mom.
- Remember when our parents died?
Oops.
- Pronunciation of Das Boot.
- “Mispronouncing something wrong.”
- No, the episode isn’t 10 hours long.
- European/Europan.
- Yes, decahedron was corrected to dodecahedron. But it’s still described as a ten-sider with triangular faces.
- There are other ways to recognize a 20-sided shape than counting faces.
Real or fanfic, 44:22
- Mike guessing
- Fanfic ✔️ Fanfic ❎ Fanfic ✔️ Fanfic ❎ Fanfic ✔️ Real ❎
- Conor guessing
- Real ❎ Fanfic ❎ Fanfic ❎ ? Note that the 1st is Cline, but not Armada.
Inacronym, inaccurate acronym.
A clip will be posted, like hot dogs?
Live show coming up, will be recorded. (No, it won’t, unfortunately.)
Ep. 15, ch. 19-21 (up to phase 3)
Don’t do this
- The alien invasion still hasn’t begun!
- Keep the war on drugs going until this gamer weed is perfected.
- Not just using the word “said”.
- Mom was FOND of pointing out his gaydar was broken, OFTEN.
- Everybody’s so horny.
- How did Lex get promoted that fast?
- Gallows humor isn’t a well known word?
- Description of battle, not engaging.
- Comparing a battle to Christmas lights, popcorn and beer cans. Not very battle-y.
- Oh, it’s your first moon quake?
- I stab at thee, the Khan quote.
- Consistently calling a ship shaped like a dodecahedron a dodecahedron. It had 3 names!
- Boring: navigating through menus.
Running gags
- Golf ball atop a shot glass.
- Lag.
- Hauling ass.
Oops.
- Forgot Whoadie is a Shakespeare fan, or at least watched a lot of it.
Real or fanfic, 41:35
- Conor guessing
- Fanfic ✔️ Fanfic ✔️ Fanfic ✔️ Real ❎
- Mike guessing
- Fanfic ✔️ Fanfic ❎ Fanfic ✔️ Fanfic ❎ Real ❎
Ep. 16, ch. 22-end
Don’t do this
- Rushed chapters, abrupt ending.
- A lot happens in 1 sentence, could be a separate book.
- Lex ex machina.
- Happily nodding while so many people just died.
- Not checking the gym for people before shooting the roof.
- Long fingers. (Zack’s mom.)
- Repetition of words. Contorted (face). That playlist.
- “Is that a tricorder?” End scene.
- Being reminded of something that is exactly the same.
- Being impressed by HD. On a small screen.
- It makes no sense, I understand it perfectly.
- Blushing visibly.
- How rankings work.
- Screaming for a long time.
- And that was all it took.
- Seconds later: Reports are coming in.
- Cliché ending.
- Society is mentioned, but it was actually 3 people.
- The swastika in the beginning was stupid.
- In 1 sentence: Clean abundant energy. Cures for cancer.
Running gags
- Goods and services.
- Long fingers.
- Hot mom.
- Remember when our parents died?
Stuff from ommadawn.dk (Lise Andreasen) 
